It takes two to correspond (I think)

I'm always amazed at the number of friends Jessica Fletcher keeps in touch with. Episodes have her traveling to visit folks in Texas, London, Ireland, Hawaii, Paris, Jamaica, etc. She must be very dilligent with correspondence. I'm sure she speaks with some by phone but I believe the majority of her correspondence is done by snail mail since she is a mystery writer.

Anyone who knows me well is aware that I am not the most diligent with personal correspondence. In fact, I carry a great guilt with not being in touch as often as I would like with many people. But as I see the cassette tapes, letters, and phone calls Jessica receives from her friends around the globe, I have to ask a question. Why hasn't the person I haven't called or written not called or written me? Doesn't a relationship take two to tango?

There are unspoken rules around this topic, no doubt complicated by variables such as type of relationship and frequency of correspondence. One rule is that call/email responsibility usually goes back and forth. This means if someone calls you, you call them back next time. Another unspokon rule is maintaining established holiday correspondence. If you send someone a Christmas card every year, this should not end. Often times the holidays are the only time we keep in touch with certain people and this is ok. My personal belief is that the best friendships are those that pick up where they left off without guilt of how long it has been since you spoke.

So, should the guilt continue if I made the last call? I'm not sure. But I still strive to be like my favorite character and send snail mail announcing I will visit soon to whatever slice of paradise they reside.